LET'S GET TO KNOW EACH OTHER!

Hello, I am an earthling!

Thirty-five years ago, I emerged from my mother's womb and opened my eyes to this universe, which we then only knew as the sole form of life and the planet we inhabit. Since then, like all of us, I have been progressing on the path of writing my own story as a human earthling (briefly, I will refer to myself as an earthling at times from now on).

Ancient wisdom says that a human is born first as a human being, yet still only human, and it takes time to become truly human; in other words, it is said that one only becomes a human through the journey of self-discovery over time.

The inscription at the Delphi temple, "Nosce te ipsum" - "Know Thyself," narrates the process of "evolution" that one must undergo in order to understand oneself and one's purpose, to better grasp the world one traverses, and to integrate one's existence with all beings by sharing one's current state with others. This journey of evolution, filled with experiences and discoveries, lasts a lifetime, and the path will differ for everyone. In this, my first sharing, let us get acquainted, I would like to speak of the universe of an artist who seeks to position their life around this existence.

As a child, growing up in a small town, my curiosity about other worlds first began in the days when the internet was slowly making its way into homes, and many of us frequented internet cafes. I vividly remember starting my exploration by searching for New Zealand on Google, as clear as if it were today.

Certainly, my inclination stemmed from the curiosity instilled in me by the movies I watched and the books I read. However, looking back now, I can see that the underlying reason was the boundless curiosity and sense of exploration that evolved within my world, nourished by what I saw, experienced, and imagined. I recall a moment from my middle school years when I attempted to strike up a conversation with a Japanese gentleman who had come to the city. Although I could barely communicate beyond taking photos during the day, I managed to establish enough communication with my camera to take a picture of a green penguin sculpture. Interestingly, while I may not remember any other details about that photograph, I can vividly sense the emotion associated with it. Thus, we glimpse the initial stages of my curiosity for meeting new people and exploring different cultures.

Years later, as I traveled through dozens of countries, discovering the cities where I wandered the streets and exploring the lives of new people brought by the flow, I experienced a profound sense of unity similar to what I felt when I engaged with art, a feeling that still persists. In fact, my experiences with art allowed me to establish a better relationship both with my inner world and with the infinite realm of possibilities outside.

 Art first entered my life during my childhood; in elementary school, I would spend hours at the end of our art teacher's classes, unwilling to leave my paints, and when I returned home, I would lock myself in my room for hours, singing songs and cutting and sewing whatever piece of fabric came into my hands, producing items I could use with simple needle and thread.

Alongside all of this, I was also a very sensitive child. My sensory organs seemed to work at high speed simultaneously, perhaps explaining why I constantly felt the need to channel my accumulated emotions and thoughts into something tangible. I had an ongoing effort to understand my inner world and communicate better with the outside world, accompanied by the questions that arose. Who was I, what did I want, how did I feel, why did I feel that way? I kept journals during those times, writing down whatever I felt.

Throughout my high school and university years, there wasn't much change in my inclinations. I found myself combining the knowledge I acquired over time from various sources. Alongside the vast sea of art at Mimar Sinan Fine Arts University, where I studied urban planning, and the perspectives gained from my chosen profession, I decided to start drawing again at one point. It was during my research trip to Rome for my Urban Design master's thesis that this awareness was truly born. As I worked on spatial perception and constantly explored the city for my research, I decided to convey my observations through my drawings. I began carrying a small sketchbook, a few pencils, and watercolors in my kit bag. Through this process, I entered the world of urban sketching, where I depicted my experiences with the places I found myself in through simple lines.

This experience allowed me to merge my passion for discovering new places and people with the profound beauty hidden behind the ordinariness of everyday events that unfold in the flow of life. As I translated my desire to explore more into paper, capturing the details, these drawings became a documentation and a form of self-expression for me over time. Drawing allowed me to see the details more clearly, engraving memories into my mind with greater precision. Looking back, as I remembered the state of being and the feelings I experienced in those moments down to the smallest details, I found myself rebuilding my own world.

Over time, while I began integrating my drawings into the digital world, my relationship with paper and paint always continued in parallel because I believe in the importance of tactile experience.

During this process, as my drawings flowed, I also continued to immerse myself in singing, dancing, and exploring and experimenting with new methods because I could see that experiences involving sound and body movement were tremendous tools for an individual's interaction with themselves and the external world.

I believe that what some might call "being insatiably curious" is actually about understanding oneself, knowing what one loves, and even what one dislikes. While passions cannot be chosen like apples in a market, I believe in the view that such a trait signifies a person's self-awareness. Unfortunately, as we are raised under an educational and cultural framework that often discourages experimentation and risk-taking, we tend to become more afraid of trying new things as time goes by. When we were children, we simply dreamed; freely, without reservations, and sometimes fearlessly. However, as we grow older and face the struggles of life, our spirits, once vibrant, tend to become more subdued within the confines of our bodies.

In today's world, where each day seems to flow faster than the last, individuals find themselves caught in a relentless current, unable to create stops to question where they are going or what truly matters to them. Consequently, even though their bodies are present in this world, they continue to exist spiritually adrift, lost and disconnected, navigating through an unhappy, meaningless stream of existence. Experiencing the passage of time, which we refer to as life, I've come to realize that one of the fundamental fears I've harbored since childhood is the thought of wasting this lifetime without being able to say "I have lived." It is perhaps during this process of understanding that I've recognized art and travel as two of the greatest sources that have helped me heal and continue on my journey, sometimes stumbling along, sometimes laughing, sometimes hitting rock bottom only to rise again, maybe falling once more, but living with less fear of resurfacing.

That's why I found myself writing this piece in the middle of the night. Because I understand that this writing, and the subsequent journey, stem from my belief that beautiful things multiply when shared, and that each of us finds inspiration in each other's stories.

Today is March 5th, 2024, and in the early hours of my 35th birthday, I am sharing this piece that I believe marks the opening of a new chapter in my life. I first embrace myself, then all the fellow earthlings who have supported me along the way, as well as my family. I extend my gratitude to all the other earthlings who have accompanied me in my life's journey, shaping my perspective with their many experiences, whether good or bad. Thank you, I am growing.